Beginner’s Guide to Prostate Play: Safe, Comfortable & Step-by-Step Exploration

This guide covers the biology, techniques, safety, and mindset needed to explore prostate play in a beginner-friendly and approachable way.

What Is the Prostate (P-Spot)?

The prostate is a small gland located a few inches inside the rectum, just below the bladder. It plays a role in reproductive health, but it’s also rich in nerve endings—making it a source of intense pleasure for many people.

Often referred to as the “P-spot,” stimulation of the prostate can create sensations that feel different from penile stimulation alone. Some describe it as deeper, more full-bodied, and longer-lasting.

The Science of Prostate Pleasure

The prostate is connected to the pelvic nerve network, which links to the genitals and surrounding areas. When stimulated, it can amplify arousal and, in some cases, lead to orgasm without direct penile stimulation.

• Stimulates internal nerve endings
• Can intensify erections and orgasms
• May produce “dry” orgasms (without ejaculation)
• Often described as deeper and more full-body

Not everyone experiences it the same way—and that’s completely normal.

Who, What, When, Why

• Who: Anyone with a prostate can explore it
• What: Gentle internal stimulation of the prostate gland
• When: When relaxed, curious, and unhurried
• Why: To explore new sensations, enhance pleasure, and deepen body awareness

Breaking the Stigma

One of the biggest barriers to prostate play is stigma. Many people associate it with shame, masculinity concerns, or sexual identity—but these are cultural ideas, not biological truths.

Pleasure doesn’t define identity. Exploring your body is simply that—exploration.

• It does not determine sexual orientation
• It is a normal part of anatomy
• Curiosity is healthy and common

Open conversations and education are helping to normalise prostate play as part of sexual wellness.

Prostate Play by the Numbers

While research into prostate pleasure is still developing, existing studies and surveys give us a useful picture of how common—and increasingly accepted—this form of exploration is.

• Over 50% of men report having tried anal masturbation at least once, which can include prostate stimulation
• Around 25% of men report experience with receptive anal intercourse
• Men are more likely than women to reach orgasm from anal stimulation alone
• 86% of surveyed users say they’ve tried prostate play at least once
• 40% report highly intense, “full-body” orgasms from prostate stimulation
• 44% of people say they feel comfortable discussing anal play with a partner

It’s important to note that these numbers vary depending on how questions are asked and the level of anonymity in surveys. Because of lingering stigma, real world participation is likely higher than reported.

Preparation & Hygiene

Using the bathroom beforehand can help you feel more relaxed and comfortable. A quick shower or gentle external wash is usually all that’s needed. Some people prefer a light internal rinse (douche), but this is entirely optional. If using fingers, keeping nails trimmed and clean helps avoid discomfort.

Preparation doesn’t need to be complicated—simple, basic hygiene is more than enough. Feeling clean can boost confidence, but there’s no need to aim for perfection.

It’s also worth acknowledging something honestly: there’s always a small possibility of encountering a bit of faecal matter. That’s simply part of how the body works. Good preparation can reduce the likelihood, but it can’t eliminate it completely.

Being comfortable with that reality helps remove anxiety and keeps the experience relaxed. We’re all human, and bodies aren’t perfect. Is it the most pleasant part of sex? No—but it’s a normal possibility, not something to feel embarrassed about.

As consenting adults, it’s important to approach this with awareness, respect, and open communication—both with your own body and with any partner. A calm, understanding attitude makes a big difference.

Lubrication Is Essential

The body doesn’t naturally produce lubrication in this area, so using lube is an important part of keeping things comfortable and enjoyable.

Take your time applying it, and don’t be shy about using plenty—more than you think you might need is often just right. Water-based lubes are a great starting point as they’re easy to use and clean, while silicone-based options tend to last longer and provide a silkier feel.

Moving slowly and staying relaxed makes all the difference—comfort should always come first.

Beginner Techniques

Start simple and slow:

• Begin with external touch and relaxation
• Use a clean, lubricated finger
• Insert slowly and gently
• Angle slightly toward the front of the body
• Use a “come here” motion

You may feel pressure like needing the bathroom at first—that’s normal and usually passes. Learn your body- what it likes, dislikes and proceed with patience. Pleasure is not a race tot he finish line.

Using Prostate Massagers

Specially designed prostate toys can make exploration feel more intuitive, comfortable, and accessible—especially for beginners who are still learning what works for their body.

They’re typically shaped with a gentle curve to help reach the prostate more easily, and include a flared base for safety and peace of mind. Some designs are made to be worn hands-free, allowing you to relax into the sensation, while others include vibration for added stimulation and variety.

👉 Explore our Anal Toys Collection for beginner to more advanced options. We have both Vibrating Prostate Massagers and Standard Prostate Massagers.

Brands like Aneros, b-Vibe and Nexus have specialised lines of p-spot massagers that have stood the test of time when it comes to anal stimulaton.

Solo vs Partner Play

Advanced Techniques

As you become more comfortable, you might explore combining prostate stimulation with other forms of touch, such as penile stimulation, to see how sensations build together. Playing with different rhythms and levels of pressure can also help you discover what feels best for your body.

You can experiment with positions too—lying on your back, on your side, or in a squat—finding what allows you to relax most easily. Some people also enjoy incorporating vibrating toys to add another layer of sensation.

Take your time with it. There’s no right or wrong way to explore, and no level you need to reach—just what feels good and comfortable for you.

Safety First

Always choose toys with a flared base so they’re designed for safe use.

Take things slowly, and never force anything—your body should always guide the pace. If you feel pain or discomfort at any point, it’s a clear signal to pause and reassess.

Using plenty of lubricant can make the experience smoother and more comfortable, helping to reduce friction and tension. Afterward, take time to clean your toys thoroughly so they’re ready and safe for next use.

Most importantly, stay in tune with your body. If something doesn’t feel right, it’s always okay to stop. Comfort and safety should always come first.

Troubleshooting

If something doesn’t feel quite right, it’s usually just a matter of adjusting and slowing things down.

If things feel uncomfortable, try adding more lubricant and easing into it more gradually. If you’re having trouble locating the prostate, a slight adjustment in angle—typically aiming gently toward the front of the body—can make a difference. If you’re not feeling much pleasure right away, that’s completely normal; it often takes time, relaxation, and a bit of practice for your body to respond.

If you notice tension, taking a moment to breathe deeply and consciously relax can help your body settle and become more receptive.

Like any new skill, prostate play can take a little time to learn. Patience goes a long way, and the experience often improves as you become more familiar with your own body.

Final Thoughts

Exploring prostate play is a personal journey, and there’s no single “right” way to experience it. For some, it may be something they enjoy occasionally; for others, it can become a regular part of their sexual wellbeing. Either way, it’s about curiosity, comfort, and discovering what feels good for you.

As with any form of intimacy, the most important elements are patience, communication, and respect—both for your own body and for anyone you may be sharing the experience with. Taking things slowly and listening to your body helps create a positive, low-pressure experience.

It’s also worth remembering that not every attempt will lead to immediate results, and that’s completely okay. Like any skill, it can take time to learn what works best for you. What matters most is that you feel safe, relaxed, and in control throughout the process.